Not Me! Monday

Not Me! Monday is in honor of Sweet Stellan this week, so read on MckMama, read on!


This week I most certainly did not spend hours in prayer on Sweet Stellan's behalf. I did not pray for his tiny heart to correct itself, so he could get some rest. I did not beg, plead, cry before Our Lord for this baby. I did not lift his mother up in prayer, because she was not constantly on my mind. I did not worry if she was taking care of herself. I did not stay attached to my computer and check for updates regularly. I most certainly have not told many people about this sweet boy and his family this week...and have not asked for their prayers. I have not woken up in the middle of the night to pray for this family. They are not on my mind constantly. Sweet Stellan has not reminded me to put things in perspective, as I return from maternity leave and leave my daughter today. I have not praised the Lord for keeping Stellan with us! I have not renamed Stellan, "Sweet Stellan!"

Current Book: I'm Fine with God...It's Christians I Can't Stand

I'm Fine With God...It's Christians I Can't Stand
Getting Past the Religious Garbage in Search for Spiritual Truth
by
Bruce Bickel & Stan Jantz

This is the book that I am currently reading. It is a book by two Christian men who are in search of spiritual truth. I guess their goal is to make people (Christians) think with the brain and the heart God gave them. What a thought!
***I look forward to finishing this book and hopefully putting it to good use! I will post and let you know what I think of the whole book.

Logann's Short Timeline and Pray for Chris

Logann's Timeline

I was looking at Logann today, and noticed how much she has changed in the short 3 months she's been here. Take a look and see what you think!

3 month pictures coming soon!!!

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Please Pray for Chris!

Chris had all 4 of his wisdom teeth taken out today. He was in a LOT of pain earlier, but seems to be doing better right now. Please keep him in your prayers that he will heal quickly and will not be in too much pain.

Conversations with Matthew and Stellan Reminds Me How Lucky I Am!

Matthew: "Mommy, am I big?"

Me: "Yes Matthew, you are getting pretty big."

Matthew: "Can I drive yet?"

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Matthew: "Good night, Mommy. I love you so much!"

Me: "Good night, baby. I love you sooo much, too!"

Matthew: "Okay, be good today."
***I wonder where he's heard that?***

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Me: "Matthew, did you know Logann is going to start school on Monday?"

Matthew: "Yeah, but she's going to be in the BABY class."

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Matthew: (singing) "Take me down to the paradise city, where the grass is green and the girls are pretty! Please take me home, yeah, yeah!"

Me: "Wow, Matthew, that was good!"

Matthew: "Rock and Roll baby!"

Me: "What other songs do you know?"

Matthew: "I know my 'Vowel Song' pretty good."

Me: Can I hear it?

Matthew: "I don't have time right now."

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In the car
Matthew: "Hey, Mommy. You're my best friend."

Me: "Oh, you're my best friend, too."

Chris: "Hey Matthew. You're my best friend."

Matthew: "No, I'm Mommy's best friend!"

***This would be really funny to me, except the roles have been reversed, and I was not the best friend.***

I love you my sweet Matthew...more than you will ever know!


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Stellan Reminds Me How Lucky I Am!

God has recently reminded me how truly blessed I am to have such healthy children. I started reading MckMama's blog this summer. I loved to hear about her many small children as I was taking care of, and growing, my own MSC. I also became familiar with her unborn son Stellan who was diagnosed with heart problems in the womb. MckMama was told that her baby would probably die before he was born. Very long story short, Stellan was born with NO sign of a heart problem. MckMama used her experiences to try to show others God's awesome power. Even when things were not looking good, she never quit praising our Lord. Since being born, Stellan has suffered with RSV and recovered.

Now, he is near death again, and many are rising up to pray like I have never seen. My heart has been heavy these past few days. Every time I look at, or hold, Logann and Matthew, I can't help but say a prayer for Stellan and his mother. I have woken up in the middle of the night and felt lead to pray for this little baby. I do not know what God is doing in the whole situation. I do not know what His plan is for baby Stellan. I do know that Stellan has caused me to take to heart how blessed I truly am. I have had very easy pregnancies and births, and my children are so healthy. I praise God for the miracle of life and the miracle of healthy babies/children. I praise God for the line of communication He has so divinely put in place for His children to reach Him. I praise God for the gift of the Holy Spirit that knows our souls and intercedes when we are so distraught or confused, or when we don't even know what to pray for. Please pray for baby Stellan and take note of how lucky you are!

Please Pray With Me!

Please Pray for Baby Stellan!

Stellan is in desperate need of prayer! Please pray for his sweet little heart to calm down. If you do not know who he is, this blog will fill you in. If you do know who he is, the same blog will tell you what's going on. Please, please, please pray for this baby and his family.

In Him-
Jenny

Blessings

Sometimes when life seems hard, I like to remember what I have to be thankful for!

I am thankful for:

• my beautiful, healthy daughter, with her sweet dimples and precious smiles
• my handsome, healthy, smart son, with his kind words and funny stories
• my wonderful supportive parents, brother, sister, in-laws, and all my family
• my loyal, hardworking, best-friend husband, with his sweet hugs and kisses
• my nice, warm, comfortable home, that holds my growing family
• my loving, caring friends who mean the world to me
  
• my dream job doing what I love
• my precious health that allows me to spend time with the people I love, doing what I love
  
• my wonderful Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, and the unconditional, unending, pure love He gives me and the gift of everlasting life
  

Names, The Escape Artist, and Motherhood

Names
For a while, I thought it was best if I kept our names quiet. Then I asked myself, why? They are quiet no longer!

The Escape Artist

Little Logann is becoming so active. She is cooing and squealing all the time. She is so much fun to watch! Several days this week, I have sat beside Logann and watched her try to escape from her bouncy seat. She is the wiggliest little girl I have ever seen. She has been successful several times. I thought it was to hilarious not to share with you.

I made it!

You may be wondering "Why doesn't she buckle her in?" Well, she's not big into restraints:). She is just now getting to where I can put her down for more than two minutes, so I just sit beside her and watch her. It's funny, as soon as I saw her doing this I immediately thought of Matthew who did the same exact thing. I have a picture I will try to find and post it later!

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My Thoughts On Motherhood

I wanted to share a post that I blogged somewhere else. Being a mother is my main job these days, and it is the hardest, and most rewarding, job that I have ever had. Please read on, and know that if you are a mother, you are doing the greatest work you will ever do!

Written February 7, 2009

Growing up, I thought I had a wonderful mother...well, I still do! I loved the time she spent with us playing, snuggling, and teaching. I thought she was a perfect mom. Looking back that is what I remember. Imagine my surprise when I discovered that she felt many of the same feelings that I have been feeling over the past three years. I felt the need to write this blog because I know that many of my friends here are mothers or will soon be mothers. I read a blog that made me stop and think the other day. I wanted to share my opinion of motherhood, so if you are interested, please read on.

I want to start by saying that I love my children with my whole heart. I did not know that I could love anything on Earth as much as I love my children. This love is instant, painful, joyful, undying, unshakable, and stronger than I could have ever imagined. I am completely in awe that God loves ME even more than I love my children. I have wanted children for as long as I can remember. I LOVE my children! I love playing with them, snuggling and rocking them, dancing and being silly with them, teaching them, watching them grow, listening to Matthew's funny stories and comments, listening to Logann's baby babble, and just being with them. I was so thrilled when I found out I was pregnant with both of my children. I knew my life would be changed forever. I really could have never imagined how true this was.

With all of this said, being a mother is SO HARD! Some things I have experienced as a mother are sleepless nights, lack of time for myself, disciplining the 3 year old for putting a friend in a box at school, correcting potty-mouth language, breastfeeding, teaching children to tell the truth, changing diapers, potty-training, teaching colors, letters, shapes, and numbers, teaching children to share, doing all the laundry your children produce, taking sick kids to the doctor, almost passing out when stitches are needed, feeling disgusting because you are covered with spit-up and haven't had a shower, spending time at Vanderbilt for dislocated elbows, and lots of worry. Worry...am I showing my children Jesus everyday? Am I raising confident, not conceited, children? Am I spending enough time with each one? Am I always calm and patient with them? Am I always a good example? Some days, I think that I am letting my children down even though I love them more than they will ever know.

My message to you is this... I found out that my "perfect" mother felt the same way that I am feeling now. The truth of the matter is that there is NO SUCH THING as a perfect mother. I tend to be very hard on myself. I tend to expect more of myself than I probably should. I have a feeling that many of you reading this do the same thing. Please don't be too hard on yourself. Try to enjoy yourself...the time goes by too fast!

I know now that my mother was not "perfect," she was just perfect for me. She loved me with all of her heart and that is what I have always known. I absolutely love being a mother and I hope that Matthew and Logann will remember how much their mother loved them, even though she was not perfect.

Not Me! Monday

I am here again to tell you of the things I DID NOT do this week! I HAVE NOT fallen in love with Johnson's Bedtime Bath. I DO NOT bathe my children in it every night. I have NOT decided that I love it so much, that I myself HAVE NOT started bathing in it as well. It's for babies...right? After having dinner at my parents' house last night, I most certainly DID NOT put a diaper on my potty-trained son for the ride home so that he would not have an accident in his car seat if he fell asleep, as he did after a recent trip to Whole Foods Market. I would NEVER take a step backwards, and carry him "like a baby," at his request, after I DID NOT put the diaper on him. I also am very on top of things. I would NEVER sign up for two consignment sales that overlap, having the pick up and drop off day being the same day. So today, I DO NOT have to pick up unsold clothing from WOW, change all the tags, and drop the clothes off at Buttons and Bows, all within a couple hours of each other. I am WAY too on top of things to let this happen. The last thing that I am going to share with you is this...I DO NOT have a new obsession with doing laundry. I DO NOT love all things laundry related such as: Shout stain remover, All detergent, and Bounce fabric softener. I DO NOT get a kick out of having all towels, clothing, blankets, sheets, and all baby items clean at the same time. I DO NOT walk around the house and wonder what else I could put in the laundry. I DO NOT often stop at folding Chris's and my clothes though, and leave them in baskets for weeks, because I DO NOT despise hanging clothes up. I DO NOT have an obsession with laundry because that would just be strange.

If you're interested in seeing how many other moms handle themselves, visit My Charming Kids.

16 Days

I have 16 days until I return to work. I have to admit, I am a little stressed. I am not quite sure how I am going to get up in the middle of the night with the baby, get up in the morning and get 2 children ready, get myself ready, get the children where they need to be, and get to work on time. The good news is this...

I go back for one week (count it...5days), then I have Spring Break for a week! Then I come back for 5 more weeks and then I am out for the summer! By the time I have it all figured out, I will be out of school. I think I can handle it though! I am really trying not to think about it too much. The guilt kills me.

I have been blessed to be able to stay home with my baby for 3 months. I am so blessed to be a mommy!

"M's" Timeline of Photos

I was looking at some of "M's" pictures on my computer today and realized how much he has changed. Here are a few pictures over the past three years. Enjoy!

Where does all the time go? I am reminding myself, and all of you that may be reading this, to try to enjoy every day that you have with your children. It appears to me that they will be grown before we realize it!

An Ear Infection and A Sleep Over

An Ear Infection

I was hoping that some of you could send your prayers "L's" way! Poor little sweetness has an ear infection! Last night, she just cried and cried. Then we realized she had a fever. I took her to the doctor this morning. They gave her antibiotics. My little girl has her first illness! Please pray that her ear gets better soon and doesn't hurt her too much.



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A Sleep Over

"M" is off to spend the night with his NaNa. When I dropped him off at her house, he didn't look at me again. He has not gotten to spend as much time with her since he's been home with me on most Thursdays. He was SOOOOO excited! He loves his NaNa so much! When I left, he was ready to go for a swim in her HUGE bathtub. Thanks NaNa for letting "M" have a slumber party with you tonight! I hope you have fun, but I will miss my baby boy!

On another note, I won't know how to act in the morning. I usually am awakened by his demands of "show"(i.e. Mickey Mouse), "milk" and "bars"(Nutri-Grain.) My son has an enormous vocabulary for a 3 year old, but first thing in the morning, he is direct, and to the point! It will be strange for him to not be there. It will be like having only once child again! AHHHH!

Not Me! Monday

Introducing...my very first "Not Me! Monday" brought to you by MckMama. It's nice to let you know what I DID NOT do this week, and feel completely great about it:) Tonight, I most certainly did not brush "M's" teeth, let him eat ice cream, and then send him to bed without brushing his teeth again. This week, I DID NOT wish (on more than one occasion) that I was on a deserted island, with no children or husband, and a nice cold drink in hand. I DID NOT fall off the wagon and eat half a package of chocolate chip cookies by myself after doing an hour of cardio...because that would have made my cardio a complete waste of time! Last, but not least, I most certainly DID NOT enjoy blogging so much that I stayed up well past my self-imposed 9:00 bedtime trying to figure it all out!

Matthew's First Fishing Trip

I had to go to a friend's baby shower today. While "L" and I were gone, my boys decided to try their hands at fishing. This was "M's" first fishing trip. They caught 3 fish. "M" told me he was sad because he did not catch any fish with HIS fishing "rod." He said he had a great time though. Daddy did a good job creating fabulous memories with his little man. Here are a couple of pictures for you to enjoy.

Reeling it in...

Not quite sure what to think...

I think I can handle it...

I've got it!

"Mommy, you're my best friend."

Before I became a mommy, I would have never believed that a 3 year old and a 10 week old could possibly fill the role of best friends...but THEY DO! Tonight while I was laying in bed with "M", (yes I know he is spoiled, but he will only be little once!) he grabbed my hand, kissed it, and said, ever so sweetly, "Mommy, you're my best friend." Talk about a melting heart...just like butter! I love my two little best friends. "L" is a great listener. She just lets me talk and talk to her. She acts like she knows exactly what I am saying. She just smiles as I ramble on about anything and everything. I hope one day they both do truly consider me to be one of their best friends. Here are a couple of pictures of my "best friends" from today.

Here is "L" enjoying her music and the beautiful weather by the window.

Here is "M" helping his best friend with the dishes.

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I would like to also acknowledge my best girlfriends. The Lord has put special women in my life to uplift me, make me laugh, and to love me when I feel unlovable. My God has put a part of Himself in my friends to remind me that HE is my one, true best friend! I am so blessed by the friends I have.

To Blog, Or Not To Blog...

That was my question!

I love the idea of sharing my thoughts with anyone that cares to read. I have enjoyed reading the blogs and praying for many of the bloggers I have come across. It seems like a fabulous idea, though I must admit that I have been concerned about the privacy issue, the judgments that may be made about me, and the unfamiliar world of creating a blog. As you can see though, I am throwing caution to the wind with my wild ideas... so here goes nothing!

My plans for this blog are to simply share my thoughts, vent, relieve stress, and encourage anyone who decides they would like to read.

Tonight, my thoughts include:

1. Trying to lose baby weight
2. Not wanting to return to work from maternity leave
3. Feeling successful as a mommy
4. Marriage...not just a feeling

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My definition of BABY WEIGHT(n.)-The excess donuts and pizza that my baby obviously did not need, that I am now left to deal with.

Babies can wreck a body! I waited almost a year after having my son before I tried to get rid of the weight that I gained with him. I gained about 35 pounds. Postpartum depression played a role in the delay...or maybe it was the other way around. I also gained 35 pounds with my daughter. I started working out again when she was 6 weeks old. There has been NO sign of depression this time around. I am currently addicted to working out. Not really. It just makes me feel so darn good. I am making progress. I am currently down 30 pounds. I would like to lose more than I gained so my children will never remember their mother was somewhat unhealthy. I also think that I am done having babies, so I hope to never have to deal with BABY WEIGHT again.
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Return From Maternity Leave

In just about three weeks, I will be returning to work after being home with my children since December 17th. I have learned a few things that I am surprised to discover.

• I have learned that I love my children more than life itself.
  
• I have learned that being a full time stay at home mom is SOOOO hard.
  
• I have learned that since I do have to work (for insurance purposes) I have picked the best job there is...summers off!
  
• I have learned that my ministry is showing Jesus to my students.
  
• I have learned that God is not absent in my classroom, though it is a public school.
• I have learned that life's situations are what you make of them.

My son loves his school. He goes 3 days a week. He spends the other days with his 2 grandmothers. As for my daughter, I will miss my darling baby girl, will cry like a baby when I leave her for the first time, will be wrecked with guilt that I am not there for her, and will count down the minutes until I can hold her. What can I do though??? I will make it through, so will she. I have explained to her that I need her to share me with my other 22 children who are missing parents, Christ, comfort, a feeling of safety, approval, and unconditional love. I think she understands:)

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Top 10 Things That Make Me Feel Successful As A Mommy
(In No Particular Order)

1. Smiles
2. Laughter
3. Hugs and Kisses
   
4. Making any kind of shopping trip with 2 children and not losing my cool
   
5. Seeing my son share the train at Davis Kidd
6. Being able to provide for my children
7. Watching my son try to comfort his sister
8. Listening to my son's enormous vocabulary
9. Knowing I gave my children life
10. Having my son remind us to say our prayers

Here are a few pictures of the faces that fill my soul with love, delight, and awe!







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MARRIAGE

As I was reminded by a fellow blogger, marriage should not be based on a feeling. If you go into marriage thinking that you are always supposed to feel a certain way...it will surely fail. I needed to be reminded of a few points. I thank MckMama for her reminder. I have struggled with this lately. I appreciate my husband for who he is. I need to remind myself that we stood before God and made a promise. We did not promise to stay together as long as things were all lovey-dovey and roses. We promised for better or worse. It is a lot easier to stay happy together if you look for all the good in your relationship. It is not always going to be perfect, but the great times are soooo worth the struggles. I love my husband and I know that if God is for us, who can be against us????

I Love This Man (and little man:)!